Dept. of Advertising

Allergies

My allergies are not extreme. I usually don't even notice them for really long periods of time, until I get cranky and the headache is even worse and then I realize, fuck!, I'm so snotted up I can't concentrate. Today was one of those days, it just creeped up on me. I went shopping downtown for a bit after I got my paycheck and I just hated everything and everyone around me. So, I'm sorry lady at T-Mobile. You weren't actually that bad of a person, even though I treated you like you were the walking embodiment of annoying salespeople. And dude at Deisel: I, too, wish I was in Europe. It's cool. Nordstrom lady, I'm sorry I didn't try to create a moment with you. I'm not even a wealthie bitch. Just one of those days.

Last Night's 30 Rock

I know I'm late but I'm going to livetwitter it tomorrow from Hulu. Watch and respond here.

Best Website for Finding Out the Newest Restaurant Openings

The guys and gals at Voracious are currently covering this beat better than anyone else in Seattle.

Garbage

How is this news?

Underground Girl Knowledge

A few weeks ago, I recorded a podcast called "Money Where Mouth Is" at Publicola; Josh Feit's new political blog. The premise was: interviews with non-profit all stars. My first interviewee was Stacy DeLong, field organizer for Planned Parenthood votes. Check it out here.

On Regina

Some journalists at the PI embraced the online medium a long time ago. A prime example is Regina Hackett, who's "Art To Go" was never a clearing site for old youtube videos and other transparent ploys to lure readers to all the print material. Her blog is now called "Another Bouncing Ball" and you can find it here. Regina, in many ways, is perfectly suited for blogging. Like Charles, she's not afraid of writing something impenetrable, but she's also a populist. My only advice to her would be to find someone who knows html and get it looking sharp.

Quote of the Day

My only advantage as a reporter is that I am so physically small, so temperamentally unobtrusive, and so neurotically inarticulate that people tend to forget my presence runs counter to their best interests. And it always does. That is one last thing to remember: writers are always selling somebody out.

- Joan Didion

Thx Anna Roth

Dick.

Mr. Obama has repeatedly repudiated the Bush administration; in the interviews, Mr. Cheney has hit back. Speaking to Politico in February, he warned of a “high probability” of another terrorist attack. On CNN, he suggested that Mr. Obama was using the economic crisis to justify a big expansion of government. On Fox, he agreed when Mr. Hannity asked if Mr. Obama was “telegraphing weakness.”

This man has lied himself into a hole. I think he truly believes we're under attack. I think his paranoia is genuine and not a political ploy. He is looking out at a completely different country than you and I. He is looking out at the world through the eyes of a paranoid, aging fascist-nationalist.

Go See "The Goonies" at Re-Bar

I haven't laughed so hard at a single performance this year.

YouTubed Insanity

"We were endlessly self-reflexive individuals who had been marked by dabbling in drugs and semiotics; the media world we inhabited made life feel squalid, disposable, and fearful; we could hear, when we opened our mouths, the culture industry's language and not always our own. We were trapped inside ourselves—and in there wasn't even a "self." More like an empty lot crisscrossed by gusts of addictive compulsion, and littered with cultural debris. The situation made you feel ashamed. It bankrupted concepts like "dignity."

-Benjamin Kunkel

The Newest New Yorker

The newest New Yorker is a bit of a goldmine, no? We've got a solid historical piece on Earth Day, a feature on Ivy Leagers who abuse Adderal, Sasha praising Lady Gaga, a hilario Roz Chast cartoon about Spring Cleaning. Also: emails from Yo Mamma, and shouts and murmers about an ex-gay on finding Jeebus. Significance aside, I can't remember being so entertained by this mag. It's all here, for free: www.newyorker.com.

Quote of the Day

"the drama bug seemed to strike hardest with jews, homosexuals, and portly girls whose faces were caked with acne medication. these were individuals who, for one reason or another, desperately craved attention. i would later discover it was a bad idea to gather more than two of these people in an enclosed space for any length of time. the stage was not only a physical place but also a state of mind, and the word audience was defined as anyone forced to suffer your company. we young actors were a string of lightbulbs left burning twenty four hours a day, exhausting ourslevs and others with our self-proclaimed brilliance."

David Sedaris, Naked

This sucks.

WOW, WHAT A CATCH!

From Craigslist.

Do you like feeling resented by your house mate? Do you maybe want internet but probably not? Do you usually feel like a human? If so, etc!

Hi, I have a room for rent, furnished, in a two bedroom apt. that is a couple blocks from major bus lines. I'm a gay male, I'm very unconventional and though I don't really want a roomate because of the potential stress, times are tough and if I can find somebody and we can both get along, both feel like humans, both be ourselves, well, I thought I'd test the waters to see if I can find a super cool easy going gal, guy, or trans-gender person who is respectful, cleans up after themselves, is low key and can live with a very unusual gay male.

My ideal roomate would be a quiet person who'll let me be in charge, not that I want to be, it just works out better that way, somebody who just needs a decent place to stay with affordable rent and who wants go about their biz. Please, no smokers, heavy drinkers, or heavy drugs, weed is okay if it does not control your life.

Internet is a possibility, deposit/first/last months rent required. Drop me a note, tell me a little about you, thanks. Sorry, no photos. This room would be for one person only, and management doesn't allow cats or dogs, but maybe we could sneak by with smaller critters.

First Day of Summer!

"Open my windows so you can see God's glorious light," said my car. "And do it now!" I pressed down on all the window buttons at the same time while driving down a hill towards Magneson beach. The windows were stuck, they wouldn't roll down. I had been, essentially, driving in a hermetically-sealed coffin filled with dust, an old can of Yoo-Hoo, and, occasionally, people other than me. "Ffffttt," the windows said as they tried to disengage from the ceiling. "Fttttttt!" they said again as I continued to hold down the buttons. And then, all of a sudden, they were down.

Ahhh. Air. And the sun shining gloooooriously into my eyes. The wane of the air-conditioning dissipated and I could hear life, people yelling, butterflies a-flappin, Americaflags a-wavin (Helloooo Laurelhurst!). "Beep beep! Are you there, Sunshine? It's me...Mr. Pasty Face. Are you gonna make me hella tired?"

Magnason beach was a sight to behold. Bald man pushing baby in stroller. Grown baby pushing grandmother in wheelchair. Yappy dog defending picnic table. Women debating with her friend about the benefits of Green-Tea-infused drinks. People, people, people. I knew you existed before, but now you're all jumpy and in my face.

It was essential I escape from my cell phone, my ipod, everything. I threw them into the car, practically shaking my coat off of me. I thought "leave me alone." It had become a matter of life and death...I wouldn't hear a word more from anyone. For the next hour, it was about the twinkling water, the snowcone mountains, enduring uncomfortable pebblewalking for the hell of it, and not slipping on algae slime or stepping in Goose poop.

The Unfortuante Past of the EMP's New Director

I liked this article by Jen Graves and I'm hoping when Christiana Orr-Cahall gets around to responding to the charges against her, the Stranger will print her response.

Hipster Runoff Is Garbage

This has got to be one of the stupidest blog posts I've ever read.

The whole idea is that no band really cares about making music. They care about striking it big and getting lots of praise from self-important bloggers. This is vast, vast, meaningless existence crapola...resulting from the over-competitive nature of the American art world. Who the fuck cares about getting blogged by pitchfork? If that's what you and your band really care about, maybe you shouldn't even be in this scene.

So, this new "Bruno" Movie...

Soo, basically, the liberal media world is going to praise Bruno for exposing our homophobia, just as Borat was praised for exposing our racism and general geographical stupidity. But I'm expecting to have the same internal debate about whether or not Sasha's caricature (and it really is an over-the-top, cliche-ridden character) is actually re-enforcing the bigoted perception of gay people. I mean, the leather gear? Really? The obsession with Sex and the City? CLICHE CLICHE CLICHE. Fighting with dildos? Making stupid and bizzare fashion choices? Bringing a gay slave to a mall? A gay slave. To a mall. Religious people running away from the gay. It's like attack of the gays!

Hmm, let's see. Gays are obsessed with orgies and bad fashion and inserting things into their asses and scaring the bejesus out of religious people. What is this movie telling me that I couldn't already learn by reading the emails from the American Family Association?

People are going to laugh when they see this movie, but they're going to be laughing for different reasons. Stupid American homophobic teenagers are going to be laughing because "Dude, what a fag," (and I'm sure this is the sort of insight that's already filling up the Youtube comment section) and other, more tolerant folks, are going to laugh because Sasha's "exposing our nation's homophobia." Whatever. There's nothing artistically innovative about what Sasha's doing. He's not exposing anything. This movie is an act of recycling.