Taoism- Shit happens.
Confucianism- Confucious says, shit happens.
Buddhism- If shit happens, it isn't really shit.
Zen- What is the sound of shit happening?
Hinduism- This shit happened before.
Islam- If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
Protestantism- Let shit happen to someone else.
Catholicism- If shit happens, you deserve it.
Judaism- Why does this shit always happen to us?
Atheism- I don't believe this shit.
Agnosticism- What is this shit?
Rastafari- Let's smoke this shit.
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